I don't like Christmas programming.

Well, some of the old stuff is all right... A Charlie Brown Christmas is pretty good, and I'm fine with The Little Drummer Boy (even if it is somewhat Biblically inaccurate).

What bugs me is the new stuff. You know what I'm talking about-- the ones with the uplifting message of "Have faith in Santa. Oh yeah, you should also be nice to people, 'cause we say so-- erm, we mean, because it's the right thing to do and it's what X-mas spirit is all about."

Have faith in Santa? You mean Saint Nicholas, the guy who died several hundred years ago?

It's like he's become the central figure of a new religion, except that this religion is a thinly veiled excuse to go shopping. I'm sure the real St. Nick is rather ticked off at the position in which culture has placed him. Being a saint and all, one would suppose he was a good Christian, and thus wished to place God above all.

And yet he's now being elevated to god-like status. Of course, this Santa is hardly recognizable when compared with Saint Nicholas. The new Santa is an obese, bearded, magical elf who wears a red suit, drives a sled of flying reindeer (one of which has a glowing red nose), can somehow fit down a chimney dispite his girth, and spends all year making toys (or else just supervising the other elves as they make toys).

And yet it seems that this holiday is centered around this figure, whom everyone old enough to actually buy Christmas presents knows does not exist, all Christmas specials aside.

I've never really understood why this goes on. Maybe it was harmless at one time. Perhaps once Santa was portrayed as serving the Lord by giving out these gifts on Christmas Eve. I don't know.

We have holidays for great men-- President's Day, Martin Luther King Jr. Day... but these men actually existed. These men really did great things.

And we don't go into a frenzy of shopping on their days, either.

But Santa, at least the Santa which popular culture speaks of, doesn't exist. Yet we center this holiday around him.

Why?

It seems the very purpose for all this gift-giving has been forgotten. One wonders how long the holiday will survive when its original purpose is forgotten or merely ignored.

I've got a novel idea-- let's just invent a new holiday. Call it Santa Day or whatever. Celebrate it on... well, if you must keep it on December 25, we can always move Christmas somewhere else. They say that Jesus was probably born in the spring, anyways.

This way, there's no competition. Those for whom the birth of Christ has no special significance can celebrate warm fuzzy feelings and commercialism on their own day, and everyone else can celebrate the birth of Christ without the distraction of Santa, elves and magical flying reindeer.

I know this won't be taken seriously. It's not really a serious proposal.

All I know is, if I have kids, I won't tell them stories about Santa Claus. Perhaps I'll tell them the story of Saint Nicholas, but I won't tell them it was Santa who left gifts under the tree.

I have nothing against anyone who thinks otherwise. Honest. I just don't see the point in telling my young'uns something that I know isn't true. (I don't have anything against fiction itself, just fiction that's passed off as true. I have no problem with letting my theoretical tykes read storybooks. Anyone who knows me knows that I have no issues with fictitious reading material, seeing as how it's strewn across my room.)

I am getting long-winded, aren't I?